DIALOGUE NOT DEBATE  

 

 

LETTER TO RAFI AAMER…

Dear Rafi,

Although I have never met you physically, yet I find myself thinking about you and our friendship many times. I have an intuition that we can do something wonderful together, but I do not know what it is yet. I know it would be creative and philosophical.

I feel we have a number of interests in common

Science

Philosophy

Psychology

and

Literature

So I have decided that I would write you a series of letters sharing my philosophy and life experiences. You feel free to respond to the letters that inspire you and overlook the ones that do not touch you. I am hopeful that as we discover a common rhythm, we might be able to have an exciting dialogue. I feel there is so much inside you that needs to be expressed and shared with the rest of the world. Wherever I see some creative potential, I like to engage in a creative dialogue. For me dialogues are like three legged-races, both parties have to find a common rhythm.

In our relationship, I just have only one concern. I do not want to get into a debate with you. I see a dialogue different than a debate. In a dialogue there is no pressure to convince and convert the other. The emphasis is on sharing and letting the creative flow lead the discussion. Dialogues are like love letters and Khalil Gibran once said, “Don’t you ever think, you can guide love, if love finds you worthy, she will guide you.” So if our affection for each other grows through these letters, we might be guided by our mutual love and admiration for each other. I wanted to be honest with you about my concern as one of the reasons I withdraw from some of the dialogues on the inter-net is when I see dialogue transforming into a debate. That is when egos are bruised and feelings hurt.

I want to keep on learning and each friendship is an opportunity for me to grow. I hope, like good friends, we bring out the best in each other. There was a time I loved to win arguments but I know I would like to win a few hearts through my writings as all my writings whether poems or stories or essays are love letters to the world.

So let us share our philosophies and life experiences with each other and the rest of the world. Let us follow the tradition of Socrates who taught us that dialogue is one way of finding the truth. I am aware that there are as many truths as there are human beings in the world. Sharing our truths is fascinating as the process challenges us and helps us grow. I hope I keep on growing till the day I die.

I am always intrigued by people’s dreams and wait till those dreams come true. When I was a teenager I had the following dreams

…to become a writer

…to become a therapist

…to travel all over the world

and

…to have friends from all over the world

I feel fortunate that I have been successful in fulfilling my dreams. As I grow those dreams become more enriched. Since I do not know you that well, I am curious what kind of dreams did you have as a teenager?

Sharing your dreams might a good start for me to get to know you and initiate a creative dialogue. Looking forward to your response.

Affectionately,

Sohail

May 10th, 2006

 

 

 

 Send send your comments to Dr. Khalid Sohail & Rafi Aamer